Strange weekends and full weeks

That about sums it up really! The weekend was... odd. Not bad, just odd.

I was expecting to play cricket and then go to my friend Karen's birthday party in the evening, taping the Derby play-off match and watching it later.

Cricket was cancelled, which I was gutted about after last week, but at least it did allow me to go to another friend, Shelley's, birthday party in the afternoon.

So I basically hopped from one birthday to the other, and managed to squeeze in the Rams match beforehand too. It was good, it just felt slightly surreal. And birthday parties are really tiring, I think!

Sunday was strange as well. I led RS2 in the morning, and it went really well, but I left my mobile phone at home and didn't know where it was, so I felt really uncomfortable all morning... those who know me will know that I'm surgically attached to my phone and so will understand why! It felt... weird. And then I was in a really odd mood all afternoon. I'm not sure why! Mettle in the evening was great though, and lifted my spirits big-time.

This week has started with a band. Staff meeting, fhcu and a prayer-walk with a friend in the day yesterday, plus DCC (surprisingly interesting) then beer with my mate Murray in the evening.

Today has brought a mixture of despair and joy, stress and happiness and work and... well, just work actually. I'm feeling quite up and down. Do pray for me!

We have a Youth Service this Sunday and a torrent of practices for it tonight in Mettle groups. They're meeting altogether before splitting off to prepare stuff, and it's the first time we've done it like this. I'm in charge of music, which is shaping up quite nicely, but do pray it goes well. It's an attempt to get the three groups working together, so I really hope it works!

Later on tonight, Clare, Ruth, Tom and I are having a practice of our song(s?) for the Band Night. I'm already feeling nervous about it all, and I'm sure they are too.

Laura's bump is progressing quite well... she's very proud if it, which is really nice to see. She bought some maternity clothes the other day which are very practical and mildly amusing. I'll try to sneak a photo on here without her noticing!

That's a very bitty entry ... sorry! But it sort of sums up how I'm feeling at the moment... Not bad, not great, just "bitty".

Thanks for reading!

NOT making a fool of myself!

Sorry for the lack of posts over the last couple of days... my computer's been playing up again. It may be time for a new laptop (note to parents: that's a hint for my nexy birthday!).

Where did I leave it? From Saturday lunchtime onwards then. Despite not having played cricket since September, I somehow managed to NOT make a fool of myself. Fortunately, I my limited batting skills weren't required as we made 185-8, but when we fielded I came into my own. I bowled first-change and took 3-42 off nine overs, which I was pretty happy with! A touch expensive, perhaps, but one of my overs cost me 22 so when you take that one out it's a pretty tight spell. And three wickets! I've never been a big wicket-taker, so three in the first game is a pretty good start to the season. All classic off-spinner's dismissals, too: a stumping, a caught-and-bowled and (my favourite) one that turned through the gate and bowled him! Happy days! I hope the rest of the season goes as well!

Anyway, enough cricket chat (apologies to those that don't love/understand the game!). I'll talk about Youth Ministry now, since that is the point of this blog...

Sunday was a mad day. I started iff by playing the piano at the 10.30am service, then straight into RS2, where I was leading the second session of a three-week look at Paul. The first session was excellent, and next week's looks good too, but this one wasn't up to the usual YFC standards, so I had to do quite a lot of work to it to make it work. In the end, it went ok, I think.

Sunday evening, of course, brought the long-dreaded talk at the Mix. I can honestly say I have NEVER wrestled with a talk like I wrestled with this one. It was a joint effort with Lorna Jopson from SYWM, but I struggled so much with writing my two slots. The way I work on talks is to write and write and write around the subject (in this case, Church) and wait for inspiration to hit. It's normally not a problem, but this time it just wouldn't come. I finally got some of my ideas on Friday afternoon, a few more on Saturday and even a couple in the shower on Sunday morning. Scarily late!

So I arrived at The Mix having cried about it (a lot), shouted at it, got infuriated with it, given up on it, tried again, written and re-written it and I was still not sure that it was what God wanted me to say. I was a bit of a wreck to be honest.

But how often does God work through our wrecks? He so blessed the work I had put in, because I think the talk went really well! It turns out, I think, that it was EXACTLY what he wanted me to say... just shows how he's in control even when we can't feel him. I ended up talking about hugging strangers by mistake, a bit of cricket (surprise!) and ... belly buttons, actually. But as far as I can tell, it was funny when it was meant to be, touching when it was meant to be and challenging when it was meant to be. I couldn't have dared to pray for better.

One more thing, on that... the young people themselves were so supportive. Clare, Jeni, Emily and Amy spent some time praying for me before the thing started, and they'd even made a banner with an ant on it! They cheered me when I started and gave me the confidence to be myself on stage. I couldn't have done it without their support.

Which makes me think... so often this ministry goes best when it's two-way. I'm a strong believer in being yourself with young people and telling them when you're struggling. And then they want to minister to you! I'm sure I learn more about God from them than they do from me...

On the up...?

Still feeling a bit on the low side, but things seem to be a little on the up emotionally.

I don't know what it is about Term 5, but I always struggle at this time of year. I think part of it is the climb-down from the Spring Harvest mountain-top, added to being surrounded by people who have exam pressure and a lot on their plates. When you care so much about these young people, their problems become your problems a little bit. I want to share lives with them, and I wouldn't have it any other way ... but it can still be hard.

Small mercies ... Term 5 is pretty short this year - only another four weeks to go! Then we start the countdown to the Summer and September next year. Lots to do!

Work-wise, things have been pretty positive. Youth Alpha on Friday evening was 100 per cent better than last week, and there seems to be a sense that the group is starting to bond.

RE:fresh was also good on Friday ... a nice atmopshere and two really good conversations. I love unstructured work when it goes well! A lot of non-churched young people are choosing RE:fresh over drinking at the Poplar Rooms on Friday evenings, which is really encouraging!

Today has brought a good RS2 session, a Derby defeat live on Sky which means we now have to settle for a play-off place (which I would have taken at the start of the season) and tonight's Mettle session, which is looking promising.

So in all, mixed. Struggling, but feeling a bit more positive. Please don't stop praying though!